A Testimonial - MARCH 21, 2006

I had been drinking that night, which was likely the reason I wanted a hit in the first place. But I knew I should stop, I knew I only had so much, and I knew I didn't want to leave my room. I counted the pills out, counted to fifty, then took one. I put them back where I hid them, then placed a strip of tape over the door and the door frame and locked the door. The intention was to know if I'd left the room in the morning. I didn't want to be wandering the house, high on drugs. I then collapsed on the bed and closed my eyes.

The next thing I remember was the feeling of being lifted from my bed, blood rushing to my head from the position I was put in. If my eyes were open, they refused to see, but I remember feeling footfalls and my arms swinging over my head, as if I was upside-down. I remember being dizzy, then the cold metal of something electric when I was once again turned upright. I've decided this was the wheelchair lift being put to use, but I could be wrong. I dozed out again while on the ride.

Then I was up again, dead weight in someone else's arms. This lasted until a rush of cold air came, then a sharp pain to my head. I think I was dropped. This is the last thing I remember before waking.

When I woke, it was freezing and I could no longer feel my fingers or toes. My clothes were gone and I was left completely nude, and I was in the meat locker. My hands and feet were bound with rope, tied to a chain that held a large slab of beef. I don't believe I could have gotten up there on my own if I tried. My head pounded and I struggled to get free, but it was quickly clear that I would be unable to do that on my own. I began to scream for help.

I don't know how long I screamed before someone appeared. I was cold and I was scared, and at the moment, I didn't really care how humiliated I was. Maybe I wouldn't have been there if I hadn't been using, but I'm still left wondering how someone knew to attack me that night. Any other night and I'd have woken instantly. Maybe they had a plan for that and it just wasn't put into action because it wasn't necessary. I don't know.

Eventually, someone did come. Clear was the first to show up. She opened the door to the meat locker, and just stood there screaming. Kaylin ran up moments later and was much more helpful. She sent Clear to get Dave and a blanket, then dragged a chair up beside me and began to cut the rope with a kitchen knife. She cut my feet down, then my hands. By the time she got me down, Clear was back with a blanket. My clothes weren't there, and I later found them back in my room. They wrapped the blanket around me and were trying to help me out of the meat locker when Dave arrived.

I don't remember pictures being taken. I didn't know that I'd been written on until I returned to my room. For the record, I had "I LOVE MEAT" written down my back in big capital letters, and I had a mustache, goatee, eyebrows, and glasses drawn on my face with the same big black marker. Neither were easy to remove.